MELTINGDOLLS

Thanks for the comic sans and fantastic grammatical moves,...

Sat, 25 May 2013 20:20:56 -0400

Thanks for the comic sans and fantastic grammatical moves, toilet genius.

I don’t think I even need to say anything clever.

Sat, 25 May 2013 15:03:17 -0400

I don’t think I even need to say anything clever.

4 women, packin’ heat, over 60, can’t be beat!...

Sun, 28 Apr 2013 10:53:00 -0400

4 women, packin’ heat, over 60, can’t be beat! (Also, note the thing about Debbie Scmidt). #florabama

We wanna go and party. We wanna go and patty.

Sat, 27 Apr 2013 16:00:31 -0400

We wanna go and party. We wanna go and patty.

I am Bunny, and I will be drinking through this straw.

Sat, 27 Apr 2013 08:33:48 -0400

I am Bunny, and I will be drinking through this straw.

Really, Netflix? “Defiantly crossed arms” is a...

Mon, 01 Apr 2013 23:49:39 -0400

Really, Netflix? “Defiantly crossed arms” is a category I’m into now?

#unitedalloriginals #weloveatl #eav

Sat, 30 Mar 2013 09:41:49 -0400

#unitedalloriginals #weloveatl #eav

Crap Kingdom Publication Day Thoughts OR: Kanye West Vs. Nickelback

Mon, 18 Mar 2013 18:28:07 -0400

DC is brilliant and wonderful and you should buy his book. Yay!

dcpierson:

My book Crap Kingdom is available today, in stores, online, and on your eReader.

I am trying very hard to follow my girlfriend’s instructions, to resist my innate desire to douse what should be unadulterated pride and joy with self-doubt and self-loathing. Self-doubt and self-loathing are Nickleback on the modern-rock radio station in my mind. They are always on. But today I am trying very hard to drown them out.

I think I just realized I’ve been using the words “trying very hard” a lot lately. Usually in the context of “I’m trying very hard to get on the New York Times Best Sellers list.” Because I am.

I have been told by my very wise editor to temper my expectations regarding the Best Sellers list. They have this “secret sauce” they use to compute the list, and books that are in both paperback and hardcover have a natural advantage because there’s just more copies of them out there, and just like anything else, if you’re already on the list, you have an advantage over everything that isn’t on the list when it comes to, y’know, being on the list.

These warnings, well-reasoned and backed up by a lot of facts, and followed by assertions that the book is by no means a failure if it doesn’t make it on the list its first week, or ever, are like catnip to my self-doubt and self-loathing. Or, if we want to extend the Nickelback metaphor, they’re like, I dunno, Coors Light. (That seems like Nickelback fuel, right?) My self-doubt goes, yup! See? The game is fixed! The only people that can do it are the people who’ve already done it. And when somebody new does do it, it won’t be you, because you’re you. Other people are the total package, and you are a cobbled-together mess, and anyone who looks at you for longer than five seconds knows, with certainty, that you are not the real deal.

But I have other feelings that are almost always running through my head in parallel to Nickelback, thoughts I will go ahead and christen my internal Kanye West. At times like these, greeted either with frothing, unreasonable commenter-hate or completely reasonable well-intentioned and frankly dead-on advice to keep my expectations realistic so I don’t set myself up for unnecessary disappointment, my internal Kanye says, “But why CAN’T I do it? What if accepting even this totally reasonable tempering of expectations narrows the fuel line of my ambition even the slightest bit and THAT’S what results in me not making it across the finish line?”

Which is in many ways every bit as unhealthy as listening to my internal Nickelback all the time.

But you guys:

Kanye West is so good.

Read More

Pl

Mon, 18 Mar 2013 11:03:41 -0400

jessicachu: beyonce: agressive

Mon, 18 Mar 2013 10:57:19 -0400

jessicachu:

beyonce:

agressive

O! The horror! #weloveatl

Sun, 17 Mar 2013 19:12:19 -0400

O! The horror! #weloveatl

Hey, yr crowns on the ground.

Sat, 16 Mar 2013 21:54:12 -0400

Hey, yr crowns on the ground.

#weloveatl

Sat, 09 Mar 2013 12:18:36 -0500

#weloveatl

Hit the breaks when they on patrol, no way. #weloveatl

Sat, 09 Mar 2013 12:16:46 -0500

Hit the breaks when they on patrol, no way. #weloveatl

Well. Now I can die happy.

Tue, 26 Feb 2013 19:23:45 -0500

Well. Now I can die happy.

More like Forever Alone.

Tue, 26 Feb 2013 19:12:22 -0500

More like Forever Alone.

chadleymacguff: peer pressure More like pier pressure,...

Sun, 24 Feb 2013 22:00:42 -0500

chadleymacguff:

peer pressure

More like pier pressure, amirite?

Thinking of you.

Sun, 24 Feb 2013 21:52:33 -0500

Thinking of you.

A typical email from my dear old dad.

Sun, 24 Feb 2013 21:23:21 -0500

A typical email from my dear old dad.

Mis amigos. Via @jillmnoble

Wed, 20 Feb 2013 21:06:19 -0500

Mis amigos. Via @jillmnoble